a life wasted

I was browsing around IHOPs site today, specifically some of Mike Bickle's teachings and I came upon a note he had written.....

  "In Oct. 78, I had a supernatural encounter in which Jesus said, “You are saved but your life was wasted”. I protested, “You have the wrong person.” The thought came that it is impossible to manipulate the Man Christ Jesus. I cried, “Can I have another chance?” The next thought came strongly that it is appointed unto a person to die once then comes the judgment (Hebrews 9:27). I wept with a profound sense of loss and regret. What matters most about our life is what Jesus thinks when our eyes meet. I fear “regret” more than anything else in my life."

He wrote how when he came to he was kneeling on the floor weeping instead of lying in his bed.  

Can you imagine?  Coming face to face with God... His beauty, majesty, glory... and hear him say to you... "you are saved... but, you're life has been wasted"

“Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world.  For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in,  I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’

 

“Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing

  “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’

 “Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. 

For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’

 

 “They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’

“He will reply, 

‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’

--Matthew 25:34-45 

Learn to do right!
Seek justice,
   encourage the oppressed.
Defend the cause of the fatherless,
   plead the case of the widow. 

--Isaiah 1:17

Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world

--James 1:23-24

 

This is the stuff.....

I heard this song on the radio a few days ago and it hit home......

I lost my keys in the great unknown
And call me please 'Cuz I can't find my phone

This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff that's getting to me lately
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
But I gotta trust You know exactly what You're doing
It might not be what I would choose
But this is the stuff You use

45 in a 35
Sirens and fines while I'm running behind
Whoa

This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff that's getting to me lately
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
But I gotta trust You know exactly what You're doing
It might not be what I would choose
But this is the stuff You use

So break me of impatience
Conquer my frustrations
I've got a new appreciation
It's not the end of the world
Oh Oh Oh

This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff
Someone save me
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
And I've gotta trust You know exactly what You're doing
It might not be what I would choose
But this is the stuff You use

Oh Oh Oh Oh
This is the stuff You use

-- This is the Stuff, Francesca Battistelli




An unknown author writes......

“A man found a cocoon of a butterfly. One day a small opening appeared. He sat and watched the butterfly for several hours as it struggled to force its body through that little hole.
Then it seemed to stop making any progress. It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could, and it could go no further.
So the man decided to help the butterfly. He took a pair of scissors and snipped off the remaining bit of the cocoon.
The butterfly then emerged easily. 
But it had a swollen body and small, shriveled wings.
The man continued to watch the butterfly because he expected that, at any moment, the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support the body, which would contract in time.
Neither happened! In fact, the butterfly spent the rest of its life crawling around with a swollen body and shriveled wings. 
It never was able to fly.
What the man, in his kindness and haste, did not understand was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the tiny opening were God’s way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon.”

I get it.... we go through struggles, we're supposed to... we won't become what and who we are supposed to become unless we go through hard times, struggles, persecution...  still doesn't make it any easier, does it?  It doesn't for me.
  I still struggle with a situation; with being frustrated and the annoyances related to it so I haven no solution to it in this post.  I'm still working through it.  I just keep asking God to take away any anger that arises.  By being upset probably won't help me to learn what I am supposed to be learning or "grooming" me in the way I am supposed to be groomed.
  Sometimes it takes a little while for my mood or attitude to change, whether it is me not fully letting go, or just the sometimes "slowness" in the process.
I can't remember where I read it... but I did recently, I tried trying to re-find the verse but I've finished a couple books in the past week or so so I really have no idea where it came from.  It said something about being happy in the moment, and not allowing something to take that away.  I really wish I could remember it, or that I had written it down, it was perfect for this time.

"For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing" 

-- Ecclesiastes 3:1-22 

"He changes times and seasons; he removes kings and sets up kings; he gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to those who have understanding." 

--Daniel 2:21

 

Amazed

What I awoke to this morning....... I am continually amazed at things  God gives us to enjoy

You dance over me while I am unaware
You sing all around but I never hear the sound

Lord I'm amazed by You
Lord I'm amazed by You
Lord I'm amazed by You
And how You love me

You paint the morning sky with miracles in mind
My hope will always stand
For You hold me in Your hand

How deep how wide
How great is Your love for me

Trust

I have unanswered prayers
I have trouble I wish wasn’t there
And I have asked a thousand ways
That you would take my pain away
You would take my pain away

I am trying to understand
How to walk this weary land
Make straight the paths that crooked lie
Oh Lord, before these feet of mine
Oh Lord, before these feet of mine

When my world is shaking, heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave your hands

When you walked upon the earth
You healed the broken, lost and hurt
I know you hate to see me cry
One day you will set all things right
Yeah, one day you will set all things right

When my world is shaking, heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave your hands

Your hands that shaped the world
Are holding me They hold me still

 

--Your Hands, JJ Heller 

My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest. 
-- Exodus 33:14

Ever feel like the lyrics in that song?  I do... especially being a Type A personality I like everything to be planned out.  I like lists.  A lot.  I make grocery lists, to do lists, packing lists.  If it can be made into a list I have done it.

Cast all your anxieties upon Him, because he cares for you

--1 Peter 5:7

 When life and everything that goes with it is hanging in the air, it is hard for me to do anything but worry.  Worry about how to fix, how to solve, and try to plan out every detail in each possible situation.  Trying on my own to make sure that everything will be okay, everything will work out.  I do this only to find out that I have made the situation worse, wasted too much time, or made myself feel horrible by being overly anxious about the whole situation... one that I most likely have no control over what so ever.

So do not fear, for I am with you;
   do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
   I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.  

Isaiah 41:10

God tells us to do things differently.  It is never easy, but is anything He asks of us?  I find that this is always an area I struggle with... being quiet, trusting, and relying on God.  I spend too much time trying to rely on myself, plan, and fix.

See, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh; is anything too hard for me?

--Jeremiah 32:27

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth should change and though the mountains slip into the heart of the sea; though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains quake at its swelling pride... The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our stronghold.  

-- Psalm 46:1-3,7


And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. 
--Romans 8:28

Monkey Bread... yummmm

New feat today.... Monkey Bread!  Family fellowship is on Tuesday and I had to think of something I could make in advance and freeze (we don't have an oven/stove in our apartment yet).  My husband works at Teen Challenge of the Midlands.  It is similar to a treatment facility but more of a year long mentoring program for men (teens and women are at other facilities) who have any addiction be it drugs, alcohol, gambling, work... anything that takes God's place as number on in your life.

Anyway... Tuesday, family fellowship... the staff each host a group of students in their homes and serve some snacks, get to know each other more, hang out and fellowship.  So, my mother "supervised" me in making homemade monkey break from her cinnamon roll recipe for the first time.

 The only problem... we might have put a few too many rolls in the bunt pan

I think they turned out all right, just a few edges that had spilled over.  We even had left overs and made some cinnamon bread to share with the rest of the family.

I even learned how to make butter cream frosting which I will make Tuesday to drizzle over the Monkey Bread.

Glorious

You make everything glorious
You make everything glorious
You make everything glorious
And I am Yours
What does that make me?"

-- David Crowder, Everything Glorious 

My husband and I were listening to this song on the way home from my parents Christmas eve and I had a new revelation.  God is perfect, he makes no mistakes, and everything his makes is beautiful.  Satan wants us to believe that we are worthless, evil, and never good enough.  

Do you ever feel like this?  I do.  Satan is pretty good at sneaking thoughts and lies into our minds without us even realizing it.  He wants us to believe that we can't do anything right and will always fail.  But it isn't true.  No matter what it is we have or haven't done God loves us.  He made us, he created us, and loves us despite who we've been.

For you created my inmost being;
   you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
   your works are wonderful,
   I know that full well.
My frame was not hidden from you
   when I was made in the secret place,
   when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
Your eyes saw my unformed body;
   all the days ordained for me were written in your book
   before one of them came to be. 

 --Psalm 139: 13-16 

We can't believe the lies that Satan whispers to us.

"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy.."

 --John 10:10 

My father informed me of a new favorite artist.  JJ Heller.  If you haven't heard of her before you need to look her up.  My husband and I are doing worship for my parents church on January 2nd.  We are practicing one of her songs to sing.... It is hard not to cry every time I hear it, much less sing it!  It just reiterates and shows me HOW MUCH God really loves me... no matter what. 

He cries in the corner where nobody sees
He's the kid with the story no one would believe
He prays every night, "Dear God won't you please...
Could you send someone here who will love me?"

Who will love me for me
Not for what I have done or what I will become
Who will love me for me
'Cause nobody has shown me what love
What love really means

Her office is shrinking a little each day
She's the woman whose husband has run away
She'll go to the gym after working today
Maybe if she was thinner
Then he would've stayed
And she says...

Who will love me for me?
Not for what I have done or what I will become
Who will love me for me?
'Cause nobody has shown me what love, what love really means

He's waiting to die as he sits all alone
He's a man in a cell who regrets what he's done
He utters a cry from the depths of his soul
"Oh Lord, forgive me, I want to go home"

Then he heard a voice somewhere deep inside
And it said
"I know you've murdered and I know you've lied
I have watched you suffer all of your life
And now that you'll listen, I'll tell you that I..."

I will love you for you
Not for what you have done or what you will become
I will love you for you
I will give you the love
The love that you never knew

 

-- JJ Heller, "What Love Really Means"